Are we truly making an impact?

I am doing MUCH better today!! Sunday's are always spirit lifting for me. We went to the orphanage - and we have not been there for a few days, so it was so good to see the kids. Our friend, Alyson is back. She is originally from Atlanta - she is 23 years old, has such a heart for missions - she is a true inspiration for us all. She spent a few weeks in the Dominic Republic and just returned to Nicaragua - so we had some time with her - catching up - hearing about the kids she met. Many were former gang members, and young girls who were prostitutes who are now changing their lives AND the lives of other children by sharing their stories and trying to make a difference. Alyson said it gives her hope to see what they are doing - hope that maybe... we are making a true impact on the kids here in Nicaragua.

It is very difficult sometimes to love these kids - you get so close to them and as always, situations change. They go back to their families and continue to be abused, they become beggars and prostitutes and thieves....some change while they still live in the orphanage - they become "hard" due to their circumstances. It is understandable, all of it, really. They have to form a defense against the pain they feel when the people they love, disappoint them., leave them, abandon them.

It's not always the case....many have been adopted and we are all hopeful for their bright future. This is of course, is very close to my heart. But we often think that loving these kids will change their lives and sometimes...it doesn't. I think of Alberto and his struggles - the potential he had and the sad family life he returned to - but now he has a second chance to finish school and to start over. I pray that his future is a bright one.

One of my favorite children (I know I shouldn't have favorites but I do!!) Esaul - he is 4 years old and so articulate. He is always saying "Lesa, Lesa, mire" (watch me) and does the funniest things! He has a beautiful smile and I am crazy about him. I haven't seen him for a few days and was so happy to see his smiling face. He got up at church today and sang a solo in front of the crowd!! He did a GREAT job and I took lots of pictures and some video. I know he knows how much I love him and how proud I am of him...I hope this will make a difference in his life!

One thing I know for sure, is that these children are making a difference in MY life!! They bring me such joy and make me feel so close to God. Their hugs, stories, challenges and laughter move me more than I could ever express. They show me that we are all the same - that love is really all that matters.

I also see a change in my children - how they love the kids at Puente de Amistad - how they talk to them, interact with them and learn from them. When Allie first came here two years ago, she had a life changing experience - one that I feel, has helped make her the person she is today. I see it in both Scarlett and Lucie as well. These children have impacted my entire family.

We picked up my husband tonight from the airport. He actually surprised us...since his flight got in early!! So so happy to see him. It is a feeling of comfort and joy to kiss him and hold him. The girls are all telling stories at the same time...trying to catch him up on what's been going on. They were singing songs that Gracie knows in the cab ride home and it felt so good to have us all together again.

We have almost an entire week with my husband - so we are making some plans. We are hoping to hear about our court date by mid-week, so we may go to San Juan del Sur for the next couple of days - it's a tough time because we don't want to be too far away if we are needed, but want to make the most of our time with him as well.

So today was much better - today, I enjoyed my children and all the children at the orphanage. Being a Mom today was a blessing to me.