I am entering this blog the day after....long and great day but was exhausted after Skyping with my husband last night - he is quite the sneaky planner - he organized and paid for a surprise Birthday Dinner party for me!! My taxi driver Herman and his family were there, Jason and Michele, Leigh Ellen, Trish, Allyson, Carlos and all the kids - It was awesome!!
It amazes me how close I feel to these people who I just met a week ago!! We all have something in common...adoption. We all have our stories - our challenges - our successes but we know we are all in support of eachother and can lean on eachother - what a blessing it is to have them in my life! I think about how I would feel if I was here by myself, attempting to complete this adoption without any support - It would be so much more difficult.
Today, after church - Leigh Ellen, Trish and I got together to talk about our challenges - read scripture and vent. One of the things we discussed was our support system. It was very emotional for my friends to discuss the lack of support they are receiving as time goes by in Nicaragua. Many of their closest friends - surprise them - how can they be so close to them and not understand and support them through this process? They often hear things like "This time will go by fast and then you're entire family will be together" - well, when you are here trying to get through each day - this sentiment is not appreciated.
I look back on my life and I have definitely had friends of all kinds - I think the saying goes "some friends you have for a reason, some friends for a season and some friends for life" (I always mess up these sayings, so it is probably a little off!!) but this has been so true for me. I used to always want all my friends to be for life.....but it doesn't work out that way.
I have only been here a week and have already been "surprised" by my friends and family!! A very new friend of mine has been extremly supportive and I think is in this for the long haul :D Some friends I haven't heard from and some, no surprise at all and continue to be supportive. But I don't know what's in the future. More surprises?
We have such high expectations of our loved ones and of our friends - I already feel "let down" by some of mine - is that fair? Why are some of our friends/family there for us and some are not? Do they love us less? If the roles were reversed, would I meet their expectations? Am I a friend for life? How do I or should I - set this experience aside and continue my friendships when I get home?
Our expectations of others ALWAYS lets me down - maybe not immediately but eventually. God is the only one who doesn't let me down - even though I question His timing as well from time to time!! I know as time goes on, my family and friends' support will mean even more to me - I pray that I receive what I need to not go to a funny farm straight from Nicaragua!!
My husband asked me last night "How are you REALLY doing?" It made me laugh because I cannot lose it YET!!! But I like that question and as long as I have love and support - I am doing just fine!!!
Ciao for now.....
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Hi Sweetie, I hope you know how many people love you. We are not always the best at showing it, but I know how much I love you and cannot imagine that everyone you know doesn't feel the same. If they don't it is their loss. Remember one day at a time. Love, Mom XOXOXOXOXO
ReplyDeleteHello my beautiful, amazing, inspirational cousin. This morning I received an invitation to join Facebook from Aunt Carol, now remember I don't get on my personal e-mail often, so I decide to join which of course leads me to this incredible daily journal of yours. My friend and I begin reading and of course share a cry and sit back and reflect on how maybe we need to simplify our lives. Believe me, you are making a difference in more than just Martita's life, you are making a mark in many. Mine for one....I am so VERY PROUD to say you are "mi familia", which I fail to say often. Please know that I love you VERY MUCH. I will be checking in daily to follow your journal. Can't wait to meet our new addition! Love your favorite cousin ~ Sandy
ReplyDeleteHi Lesa!!! I miss you. I have ben following your blogs. It is so awesome to hear how God is showing you himself everyday. I know this must be a tough time, but You are not alone!!!
ReplyDeleteDid you get my email for Lucie? I sent it last week.
Love you, girl.
Amy
Hey Lesa - I'm just getting to the blog today (Monday at 10:20 p.m.) - it's been an up and down day for me here (I'll fill you in later but all work related stuff that's got me in a tail-spin). I love that you're updating this and hope you know how much we love and support you - we did get a camera set up and tried to skype ya around 9:15 p.m. our time but don't think you were online. We'll catch ya on there soon! We think of you every day and Sydney includes you in her prayers every night (as do I). Stay strong and give Lucie and Martita a kiss from us! XOXO to you too!
ReplyDeleteGood night - Tracy