Another step forward

On Monday afternoon, we had our 2nd Home Site visit from our Social Worker, Maria Renee. During our fostering time - it is Maria Renee's job to "observe" our family and to see how Martita is adjusting. Our 1st visit was several weeks ago and albeit, I thought it went great - there was some concern about Martita and Lucie's relationship. While our social worker was here, she observed a little disagreement between our two girls - Martita wanted Lucie's toy and Lucie basically had a mild temper tantrum....yes, right in front of our social worker. Again, I thought.....hey kids will be kids. I later discovered that because of this disagreement, our social worker thought that the girls' needed some more time to adjust.

Prior to our 2nd visit, we explained to all the girls' how important it was to "get along". We explained why Maria Renee was coming over and to show her how they really felt about each other - we talked to the girls' individually and as a group and I felt very confident that everyone understood what was at stake (yes, there was some bribery involved - don't judge me!!)

We had some last minute issues - of course, that is always the case here. No translator, problems with transportation and a last minute question of possibly changing the date of the visit. This was the only day that Tim would be here and of course, we wanted to proceed as scheduled. In the end, it all worked out and Maria Renee showed up as scheduled.

We all begin the meeting in the kitchen - sitting together. Picture Perfect. Martita sat on my lap (we didn't have enough chairs for everyone) and Maria Renee started asking questions - she asked Scarlett what she thought about the adoption and asked some basic questions about Martita's eating habits, sleeping patterns and how of course, she was getting along with Lucie!! About 20 minutes into the interview, Lucie got up from her chair, came over to where Martita and I were sitting and put her arm around Martita!! I kept smiling and listening to the social worker but was extremely concerned about what my child would do next. One thing I know about Lucie....she is very unpredictable!! Well, Lucie looked at Martita and then gave her a kiss on the cheek!! I avoided my husband's eyes because I didn't know if I could keep a straight face if I looked at him.

Lucie then took Martita's hand and they both went upstairs to play - hand in hand!! There was no screaming, yelling or running.....just quiet!! As the interview proceeded - I kept picturing Lucie and how she was loving on Martita and I kept smiling.

Maria Renee asked some good questions...she asked how Martita reacted and felt about both Tim and I - was it the same? I explained how incredible the last week was for Tim and Martita - how this time without me gave them a chance to bond - a chance to get to really know each other - and her calling him "Papi" was a great indication about how she felt about him.

She also asked me if I ever thought about calling it quits and going home. I hesitated for a couple of seconds and answered that yes, I have thought about it a couple of times. I told her how difficult it was for me to be there without my husband and without Scarlett. How much I missed home and all the people who love and support me. I explained that not knowing when I can go home was extremely difficult - much more difficult than I ever thought it would be - I was nervous about her reaction....she was writing notes as I told her how I really felt. I finished by explaining that the reason I didn't leave is because I KNOW that Martita is a part of my family - she is our daughter and I know that it is God's plan for my family - that is why I don't quit.

She told me then that she thought I was a very strong woman - that she admired my strength and faith. That she knew I would continue to be strong and a good mother to Martita. My response.....as a strong woman....was to cry and hug her at the same time!!

She explained that we are finished with our fostering period - that we will definitely be in the June Consejo. Of course, we don't know when that will be but we have finished this step in the process!! Another step finished!!

There are still so many things to complete and we still don't know when we will be home, but I think about that session - how Scarlett told her how excited she is to have Martita, how loving Lucie was to Martita and how I explained how much I love and miss my husband, and I realize how proud I am of us all right now. How much we have sacrificed and continue to sacrifice to be a family.

This was a good day.....a good resolution.....another step forward!!!